付き合い

• Reading: つきあい
• Romaji: tsukiai
• Kanji breakdown: 付き (attach/accompany) + 合い (mutual/together) → mutual association, obligatory socialising
• Pronunciation: /tsɯ.ki.a.i/

Meaning

Socialising out of obligation — attending work drinks, events, or gatherings because social duty requires it rather than personal desire.

付き合い encompasses the obligatory social activities that oil Japanese group dynamics, particularly in the workplace. 付き合い残業 (staying late because your boss hasn't left) and 付き合い飲み (obligatory after-work drinking) are common sources of complaint. While necessary for career advancement and social harmony, younger workers increasingly push back against excessive 付き合い.

Examples

1. 付き合いで飲みに行くの正直しんどい。 Honestly, going out drinking just for the sake of obligation is exhausting.
2. 付き合いも仕事のうちだって上司に言われた。 My boss told me that obligatory socializing is part of the job.
3. 断れない付き合いが多すぎて自分の時間がない。 There are too many social obligations I can't turn down, and I have no time for myself.

Usage Guide

Context: workplace, social obligations, after-work drinking, complaining about social duties

Tone: resigned, weary, dutiful

Do Say

• 今日は付き合いで飲み会なんだよね (I have an obligatory drinking party today)
• 付き合いも大事だけど、ほどほどにしたい (Social obligations are important, but I want to keep them moderate)

Don't Say

• 上司の前で「付き合いめんどくさい」はキャリアに影響する (Saying 'obligatory socialising is a hassle' in front of your boss can hurt your career)

Common Mistakes

• Confusing 付き合い (obligation socialising) with 付き合う (to date someone) — same verb, very different contexts
• Not understanding that declining 付き合い too often can damage your standing in Japanese workplaces

Origin & History

From 付き合う (to associate with/accompany). Originally neutral meaning 'association,' it has developed a strong connotation of obligatory socialising, especially in corporate culture where 飲みニケーション (drinking communication) was long considered essential.

Cultural Context

Era: Long-standing corporate culture, being questioned by younger generations

Generation: Working adults (20s-60s)

Social background: Office workers, corporate culture

Regional notes: Used across all of Japan. Particularly associated with Japanese corporate culture and the tradition of after-work socialising.