断る

• Reading: ことわる
• Romaji: kotowaru
• Kanji breakdown: 断 (dan/koto) — refuse, cut off, sever
• Pronunciation: /ko.to.wa.ɾɯ/

Meaning

To refuse; to reject; to decline. Turning down a request, offer, or invitation.

A Group 1 (godan) verb with る ending (stem ends in わ: 断わらない). Also means to give prior notice or ask permission. Japanese culture tends to avoid direct refusal, so 断る is often softened with expressions like すみませんが or ちょっと. Learning to refuse politely is an important communication skill.

Examples

1. 忙しかったので、パーティーの誘いを断った。 I was busy, so I turned down the party invitation.
2. お酒を勧められたが、丁寧に断りました。 I was offered alcohol, but I politely declined.
3. 無理なお願いはちゃんと断ったほうがいい。 You should properly refuse unreasonable requests.

Usage Guide

Context: social situations, daily life, workplace

Tone: neutral

Origin & History

From the kanji 断 (dan/koto), meaning to sever or cut off. The character contains 斤 (axe), evoking the image of cutting something off decisively.

Cultural Context

Era: Classical

Generation: All ages

Social background: Universal