Relationships & Dating

Introduction

Japanese dating culture has spawned a rich vocabulary of slang. From 沼る (falling into an obsession) to 匠わせ (subtle flexing about a relationship), these words capture the drama and excitement of modern Japanese romance.

This chapter covers slang related to relationships, dating, and social dynamics in Japan.

Themes

All Japanese Slang in This Chapter (79)

1. 匂わせ におわせ Subtly hinting at a romantic relationship on social media without explicitly stating it, such as posting photos that imply a partner's pr...
2. マッチングアプリ マッチングアプリ A dating app used to find romantic partners, such as Pairs, Tapple, or with.
3. 出会い系 であいけい A hookup or dating site/app, often carrying a slightly shady or sleazy connotation compared to modern dating apps.
4. 脈あり みゃくあり Having a chance with someone romantically; showing signs of mutual interest or attraction.
5. 脈なし みゃくなし Having no chance with someone romantically; no signs of interest or attraction from the other person.
6. フラれる フラれる To get rejected or dumped by someone, whether after confessing feelings or during a relationship.
7. 告白 こくはく A love confession — directly telling someone you have romantic feelings for them, a key cultural ritual in Japanese dating.
8. 両思い りょうおもい Mutual feelings between two people — both parties like each other romantically.
9. 片思い かたおもい One-sided love or an unrequited crush — having romantic feelings for someone who does not feel the same way.
10. 束縛 そくばく Being possessive or controlling in a romantic relationship, such as checking a partner's phone or restricting their social life.
11. ヤキモチ ヤキモチ Jealousy in a romantic context — feeling envious or insecure when your partner interacts with someone else.
12. 浮気 うわき Cheating on a romantic partner or having an affair — being unfaithful in a relationship.
13. 二股 ふたまた Two-timing — secretly dating or being involved with two people at the same time.
14. 好きバレ すきバレ When your crush finds out that you like them, usually before you intended to confess — your feelings being exposed.
15. 友達以上恋人未満 ともだちいじょうこいびとみまん More than friends but not yet lovers — a relationship that has surpassed friendship but hasn't become an official romance.
16. いい感じ いいかんじ Things are going well between two people — there's a good vibe or positive chemistry in a budding romance.
17. 付き合う つきあう To go out with someone — to officially start dating or be in a romantic relationship.
18. 別れる わかれる To break up with someone — to end a romantic relationship.
19. 元カレ もとカレ Ex-boyfriend — a former male romantic partner.
20. 元カノ もとカノ Ex-girlfriend — a former female romantic partner.
21. 復縁 ふくえん Getting back together with an ex — reconciling and resuming a romantic relationship after a breakup.
22. 未練 みれん Lingering attachment or unresolved feelings for an ex or a past situation — the inability to fully move on.
23. 草食系 そうしょくけい Herbivore type — a person (usually male) who is passive, gentle, and unassertive in romantic pursuits.
24. 肉食系 にくしょくけい Carnivore type — a person who is aggressive, bold, and proactive in romantic pursuits.
25. ロールキャベツ系 ロールキャベツけい Roll cabbage type — someone who looks gentle and passive on the outside but is actually assertive and bold in romance.
26. 小悪魔 こあくま Little devil — a flirtatious, teasing person (usually female) who charms others with playful and slightly manipulative allure.
27. 天然 てんねん Naturally airheaded or innocently clueless — someone who says or does funny things without realizing it.
28. 壁ドン かべドン Slamming one's hand against a wall to corner someone romantically — a dramatic gesture popular in manga and anime romance.
29. 顎クイ あごクイ Tilting someone's chin up with your hand to look into their eyes — a romantic gesture popular in manga and dramas.
30. 頭ポンポン あたまポンポン Patting someone on the head affectionately — a romantic or caring gesture often depicted in manga and anime.
31. ハグ ハグ A hug — embracing someone, typically in a romantic or emotional context.
32. チュー チュー A kiss — a cute, casual way to say kissing, often used playfully.
33. イチャイチャ イチャイチャ Being lovey-dovey or physically flirty with a partner — cuddling, touching, and acting affectionate in a way that's obvious to others.
34. ラブラブ ラブラブ Madly in love — describing a couple who is extremely affectionate and obviously head-over-heels for each other.
35. お揃い おそろい Matching items — especially couples wearing matching outfits, accessories, or having matching items as a sign of their relationship.
36. 記念日 きねんび An anniversary or commemorative date — especially monthly or yearly relationship milestones celebrated by couples.
37. サプライズ サプライズ A surprise — especially a planned romantic gesture like a surprise birthday party, gift, or proposal.
38. 親友 しんゆう A best friend or very close friend — someone you trust deeply and share a strong bond with.
39. マブダチ マブダチ A true, real best friend — slang for someone who is genuinely your closest, most trusted friend.
40. 合コン ごうコン A group blind date or social mixer — an organized gathering where single men and women meet in a group setting to find potential partners.
41. 街コン まちコン A large-scale matchmaking event organized in a city or neighborhood where strangers mingle at multiple venues, typically bars or restaura...
42. 婚活 こんかつ Marriage hunting — the active pursuit of finding a marriage partner through organized activities like matchmaking services, parties, and ...
43. 恋活 こいかつ Actively seeking a romantic partner — similar to 婚活 but focused on finding a boyfriend or girlfriend rather than a spouse.
44. 好き避け すきよけ Avoiding someone precisely because you have feelings for them — acting cold or distant toward your crush out of nervousness or embarrassm...
45. ツレ ツレ A close friend, partner, or companion — can refer to a romantic partner or a buddy depending on context.
46. 相方 あいかた One's partner or other half — used for a romantic partner, a best friend, or a comedy duo partner.
47. ワンナイト ワンナイト A one-night stand — a sexual encounter with someone you don't intend to see again.
48. セフレ セフレ Friends with benefits — a sexual relationship without romantic commitment.
49. ヤリモク ヤリモク Someone whose only purpose for using a dating app or attending social events is to hook up — solely interested in sex.
50. 本命 ほんめい The one you truly like — your serious romantic interest, as opposed to casual flings or backup options.
51. キープ キープ Keeping someone as a backup romantic option — stringing someone along while pursuing your main interest.
52. 写真詐欺 しゃしんさぎ Photo fraud — when someone looks significantly different in person from their heavily edited or carefully angled photos, especially on da...
53. スペック スペック A person's specs or stats — their measurable attributes like income, height, education, and looks, especially in a dating context.
54. 3高 さんこう The three highs — the ideal male partner criteria from the bubble era: tall (高身長), high income (高収入), and highly educated (高学歴).
55. 推せる彼氏 おせるかれし A boyfriend worth 'stanning' — a partner so attractive, talented, or charming that you want to show him off and support him like a fan su...
56. 沼彼 ぬまかれ A boyfriend you're obsessively addicted to — someone you can't stop thinking about or let go of, even if the relationship is unhealthy.
57. ダメ男 ダメおとこ A no-good guy or loser boyfriend — a man who is unreliable, unemployed, unfaithful, or otherwise unsuitable as a partner.
58. 距離感バグ きょりかんバグ Having a 'bugged' sense of personal distance — someone who gets too close too fast, either physically or emotionally, in an inappropriate...
59. 病み垢 やみあか A 'dark account' — a separate social media account used for posting depressive thoughts, emotional venting, and negative feelings away fr...
60. メッセ メッセ A message — abbreviation commonly used for messages exchanged on dating apps or social media.
61. プロフィール写真 プロフィールしゃしん Profile picture — specifically one's photo on a dating app or social media, which is crucial for making first impressions.
62. 愚痴垢 ぐちあか A venting account — a separate social media account dedicated to complaining and airing grievances.
63. メンヘラ彼女 メンヘラかのじょ An emotionally unstable girlfriend — a partner with mental health issues who exhibits clingy, jealous, or dramatic behavior in the relati...
64. ヤンデレ彼氏 ヤンデレかれし An obsessively possessive boyfriend — a partner whose love turns into controlling, jealous, or even threatening behavior.
65. 相互フォロー そうごフォロー Mutual follow — when two people follow each other on social media, often seen as the first step in building an online connection.
66. 推し婚 おしこん Marrying someone who resembles or reminds you of your oshi (favorite idol/character) — choosing a partner based on their similarity to yo...
67. 犬系彼氏 いぬけいかれし A puppy-like boyfriend — a partner who is loyal, affectionate, eager to please, and openly expressive with their emotions.
68. 猫系彼女 ねこけいかのじょ A cat-like girlfriend — a partner who is independent, aloof, moody, and affectionate only on her own terms.
69. ペアーズ ペアーズ Pairs — Japan's largest and most well-known dating app, sometimes used generically to mean any dating app.
70. マッチング マッチング Getting matched on a dating app — the moment when two users mutually indicate interest and can begin messaging each other.
71. 顔合わせ かおあわせ The first face-to-face meeting — specifically when people who connected online (usually through dating apps) meet in person for the first...
72. フェードアウト フェードアウト Gradually ghosting someone — slowly reducing contact and fading out of a relationship instead of formally ending it.
73. ソロ活 ソロかつ Solo activities — the lifestyle trend of actively enjoying things alone by choice, like dining, traveling, or going to events solo.
74. お持ち帰り おもちかえり Taking someone home — a euphemism for bringing someone back to your place for a one-night hookup, often after meeting at a bar or club.
75. ガチ告 ガチこく A serious, genuine love confession — as opposed to a joke confession or a casual expression of interest.
76. 地雷女 じらいおんな A landmine woman — someone who seems fine on the surface but has hidden red flags or explosive emotional issues that detonate unexpectedly.
77. あざと可愛い あざとかわいい Calculatedly cute — being charming or adorable in a clearly deliberate and strategic way, yet still effectively appealing.
78. サブい彼氏 サブいかれし A lame or cringy boyfriend — a partner whose jokes, behavior, or fashion sense make you cringe.
79. 重い おもい Too clingy or emotionally heavy in a relationship — being overly intense, needy, or demanding in a way that suffocates the other person.