Cockney Rhyming Slang

Apples and pears, Barnet Fair, and London's secret code

Introduction

Cockney rhyming slang is one of the most distinctive features of British English—a linguistic tradition born in London's East End that transforms ordinary words through playful rhyming substitutions. "Stairs" becomes "apples and pears," "wife" becomes "trouble and strife."

Originally developed in the 19th century, possibly as a code to exclude outsiders, Cockney rhyming slang has transcended its working-class East End origins to become a beloved part of British culture. Some terms have become so common that people use them without knowing their Cockney origins.

This chapter explores both the classic rhyming slang that every Brit would recognise and the lesser-known terms that only true Cockneys would understand. Learn to talk like a proper Londoner—or at least understand what they're on about.

Themes

All British Slang & Idioms in This Chapter (88)

• Porkies Lies.
• Apples and pears Stairs.
• Dog and bone Phone (telephone).
• Adam and Eve Believe.
• Butcher's Look.
• Ruby Curry.
• Brahms Drunk (pissed).
• Bees and honey Money.
• Sherbert Taxi (cab).
• Rabbit Talk.
• Rosie Lee Tea.
• Septic Yank (American).
• Titfer Hat.
• North and south Mouth.
• Boat race Face.
• Brown bread Dead.
• Currant bun Sun; also The Sun newspaper.
• Plates of meat Feet.
• Mince pies Eyes.
• Loaf Head.
• Hampsteads Teeth.
• Bacon and eggs Legs.
• Germans Hands.
• Scotch Legs.
• Brass tacks Facts (also used idiomatically).
• Raspberry Fart; also a rude noise.
• Bottle Arse; also courage.
• Khyber Arse.
• Bristols Breasts.
• Barnets Hairs (plural/different usage from Barnet).
• Gregory Neck.
• Chalk Farms Arms.
• Linen Newspaper (paper).
• Todd Own (alone).
• Dickie bird Word.
• Taters Cold.
• Bread Money.
• Lady Godiva Fiver (five pounds).
• Cock and hen Ten (pounds).
• Ayrton Tenner (ten pounds).
• Score Twenty pounds.
• Pony Twenty-five pounds.
• Monkey Five hundred pounds.
• Nicker One pound.
• Tanner Sixpence (old pre-decimal coin).
• Archer Two thousand pounds.
• Deep sea diver Fiver (five pounds).
• Steve McQueen Unseen; also screen.
• Oxford Dollar (or five shillings historically).
• Sausage and mash Cash.
• Speckled hen Ten (pounds).
• Macaroni Pony (£25); also money generally.
• Trouble and strife Wife.
• China Mate (friend).
• Dustbin lid Kid (child).
• Pot and pan Old man (father or husband).
• Skin and blister Sister.
• Plates and dishes Missus (wife).
• God forbids Kids (children).
• Bricks and mortar Daughter.
• Teapot lid Kid (child); also Yid (Jewish person).
• One and t'other Mother.
• Fisherman's daughter Water.
• Ginger Queer (gay); also engineer.
• Carving knife Wife.
• Frog and toad Road.
• Daisies Boots.
• Jack Jones Alone (on one's own).
• Old pot Old man (father).
• Artful dodger Lodger.
• Gammon Nonsense; also racist/sexist person (modern).
• Have a gander Have a look.
• Tom and Dick Sick.
• Barney Trouble; argument.
• Cream crackered Knackered (exhausted).
• Weasel Coat.
• Bubble Greek (person).
• Pen and ink Stink.
• Aris Arse (backside).
• Cobblers Nonsense; also testicles.
• Large it Show off; party hard; be excessive.
• Danny Clue.
• Pete Tong Wrong.
• Sweeney Flying Squad (police).
• Nelson Ready.
• Elephants Drunk.
• Merchant Wanker (idiot).
• Jimmy Riddle Piddle (urinate).